The Things You’ll See

Yesterday, I went out shopping. I bought a new rolling grocery cart because the one I had was held together with Duct Tape and was too easy to tip over. I found a construction dumpster and tossed the old one.

As I was walking to the train station I saw something that stopped me dead in my tracks. It was a Porche. Now, it’s not unusual to see expensive sports cars here. You see can see Porsches and Ferraris just about any day, especially if you are down near the Altstadt where you find the more upscale stores. But this Porche was different, and not really in a good way.

 

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This is the best example of the color I found.

Now, this is of course just my opinion based on my personal tastes, but this car was nice in many ways. It had a great body style, the engine sounded amazing, but the color made me cringe. I’m not sure I can describe it well enough to get you, my reader, to feel the actual physical discomfort I felt while looking at this automobile.

 

I had to wonder what on earth would make a person, who could afford such a magnificent car, choose such a color. It was a shiny metallic pink color, like teenage girl nail polish metallic pink, like 70’s disco dress kind of metallic pink, like a Hot Wheels car kind of metallic pink. It was just weird to see this on a real street legal Porche.

 

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Hot Wheels is a trade marked product of Mattel – Maybe they were part of the Gleam Team.

 

If you Google metallic pink chrome Porche you will find different models in this color. It’s obviously a somewhat popular paint choice since you can find so many examples of it. It’s just all a matter of personal taste. As for me, it gives me chest pains to see it.

 

The second thing I saw that I was sure was a sign of the end of days, was a nice family sitting at a cafe eating ice cream. Now, I’m sure you are wondering what on earth could be wrong with this?

As I was walking past this cafe, I noticed a very nice looking family of a man, a woman, and a small boy about, maybe, five or six-years-old. The man and the woman each had an ice cream cone. It was a very humid day so there were many people on the streets with ice cream cones. The man was eating his cone and the woman was sharing her’s with the little boy.

 

 

 

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Susan Walsh, Associated Press – President Barack Obama eats mint chocolate chip ice cream at Deb’s Ice Cream & Deli in Cedar Rapids, Iowa

 

None of this is odd so far, the odd part was how the woman was eating her ice cream cone. The usual practice with an ice cream in a cone is you hold the cone in your hand and lick the ice cream. That is not how this woman was doing it. She was holding the cone in her hand but she was eating the ice cream out of it with a spoon.

 

 

I am going to turn 49-years-old next month and I can honestly say I have never in my life seen anyone eat a normal sized ice cream cone with a spoon. I have no idea why this struck me as so odd and objectionable but it did. It’s not like how she eats her ice cream is going to cause the seventh seal to be broken and bring about the end of times and yet I still wanted to walk over and ask her if I could explain how ice cream cones work.

Now, if it had been one of those huge cones that are more like a bowl, where they give you three or four scoops of ice cream, then I could see it. But this was a small cone with just one scoop of ice cream on it. Maybe she just didn’t want her and her child licking on the same cone, I don’t know. It will have to remain one of those great mysteries of life.

While this post may make me come off as being judgemental, I really don’t care what color car you drive or how you choose to eat your ice cream. Do whatever you want to do to make your life worth living and I will totally support you. As long as you use your turn signal and the turn lanes when driving and you are polite to waitstaff and don’t drop your napkins on the ground and leave them there. Those are the real things I will judge you for, as we all should.

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