For the most part, I really enjoy not having a car. The public transportation here in Dusseldorf is amazing and walking everywhere is good exercise but sometimes it turns out to not be so great. More than once I have been caught in bad weather and ended up soaked by the time I got home. Just recently I sprained my ankle but still had to go do the grocery shopping for the week. The walk was about 1 mile round trip and I’ve been hurting ever since.
I knew my husband would not be happy with me walking on my sprain so I decided I was going to try to keep my pain from him for as long as I could. That lasted about two seconds after I opened the door for him when he came home from work on Monday. The minute I opened the door I shifted my weight just a tiny bit to take some of the pressure of the sprain. He looked down and asked, “What did you do to your ankle?” The man is not human!
When I confessed that it had been hurting since I got up that morning and had walked to the store and brought back two bags of groceries, limping the whole way, he promptly grounded me. I was regulated to the couch and not allowed to get up unless I was going to the bathroom or going to bed.
While I love that Tony wants to take such good care of me, it’s also hard for me to let him do it. I am a housewife and have yet to bring in a decent paycheck since we moved to Europe. Tony goes to work everyday, rain or shine, whether he feels like it or not, to make sure that we have a good life here. He is good at his job and is a great provider.
As a housewife my job is to make sure the home is taken care of and Tony gets to relax in the evenings to give him a break from his work life. These are not the rules Tony has laid down, they are the ones I have given myself. I keep the laundry done, the groceries stocked, and dinner is always ready when I know he’s going to be home. So when I get up with a sore foot on a day I need to go buy groceries, I just suck it up and go get the groceries. It’s just the kind of person I am.
If I was working at another job 8 hours a day like Tony, I would expect we would split the household duties and then I wouldn’t feel bad about asking him to get the groceries this week while I go put my foot up and then I would get them the next week. I know Tony just wants to take care of me and I appreciate it. I’m trying to get better at letting him help. Last night and tonight I let him do the dishes. For me, that is a big step. And in case you are wondering, yes, I am a control freak. I own it!